Trolley Stop

When I was 9 months pregnant with Titus, we went with the neighbors to try Trolley Stop.  What a fun place!  Well, that is until Michael spilled an entire glass of sweet tea all over me (I forgive you babe;).  While we were there, I got to catch up with our waitress who I worked with at Starbucks.  It had been about 4 years since I last saw her so we had lots to chat about.

Michael is in ATL for work, and I made a dinner date with my delightful friend Jessica.  It wasn't until we were about 5 minutes away from Trolley Stop when it hit me--Lori might be there.  One of the things that I dread the most is running into acquaintances.  The heart-wrenching questions: "How's the baby?"  Where's the baby?" or they know and its "How are you doing?"  Or the absolute worst, they know and act like nothing happened.  Needless to say, everything inside of me wanted to turn the car around and head absolutely anywhere else.  I told Jessica what I was feeling as my chest tightened up in knots.  We decided just to go hoping that she was off that night.

Nope, there she was right as we walked through the door.  We passed her walking to a table as she asked happily, "Where's the baby?  Is that him over there (pointing to a cute little fella at another table)?"  I couldn't say anything in response to her...I just stared and tensed the muscles in my neck.  She walked over to our table minutes later and I told her about losing our precious Titus.  We both cried and she held onto me as she took in my words saying "Oh my goodness. I'm so sorry." over and over again.  Then, she sat down at the table with us and asked me what happened, tears streaming down her face.  She asked how we were holding up and I told her about how Jesus was carrying our demolished hearts and bringing healing.  She listened, nodded her head and hurt with me in that moment.  We talked for a few minutes, and then she touched my hand and got up from the table shaking her head and wiping away tears.

I remember reading in one of my many grieving books about how this woman cherished everyone that would cry with her because it was like they were helping her carry the heavy load of sorrow.  I have experienced this many times with my close friends and family.  For the very first time, I saw what it meant to do that with a distant acquaintance.  After talking to Lori, my heart felt lighter and at rest.  She was not afraid to enter into the darkness of loss with me, and it connected our hearts.

Later in the evening, I stopped Lori and said "I just wanted you to know that before I came in I was dreading seeing you.  Not because of you but because of this.  I am so glad now that I saw you.  Thank you for your kindness Lori.  It really touched my heart."  All she could do was shake her head as we hugged.  As we turned to walk away, we looked eye to eye and told each other "I love you."

[Side note: this "I love you" business serves to prove that I am indeed Michael Tarrant's wife because I tease him all the time for telling unexpected people that he loves them...He's amazing.]